They say "knowledge is power," but "they" seem to forget that most of our knowledge is devoted to subjects that are completely useless and retarded. If you could somehow harness just the brain power that's currently being spent on, say, memorizing fantasy football stats, you could probably cure cancer. Nowhere is humanity's obsession with the inconsequential more obvious than on Wikipedia, where even the most obscure topics get propped up on enormous blocks of text. Here are the most depressing--and somewhat frightening--examples. #8.
List of Ancient Jedi
Summary:
Word Count: 24,801. That's more words than Oedipus Rex (15,636).
Notable Excerpt:
Why We Can Do Without It:
What We'd Rather Read:
#7.
List of 7th Heaven Episodes
Summary:
Word Count: 29,601. That's more words than The Old Man and the Sea (26,601).
Notable Excerpt:
Why We Can Do Without It:
What We'd Rather Read:
Can you guess how many times 7th Heaven mentions ass? Not nearly as many times as it does "church," we can tell you that. #6.
Tennis Performance Timeline Comparison (Women)
Summary:
Word Count: 14,411. That's more words than The Book of Revelation (11,952).
Notable Excerpt:
Why We Can Do Without It:
What We'd Rather Read:
Maybe, we'll just do that from now on.
Summary:
Word Count: 33,504. That's more words than Death of a Salesman (31,147).
Notable Excerpt:
Why We Can Do Without It:
What We'd Rather Read:
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This will make you not want to eat. Ever.
A look at today's corporate slogans, and why they're complete meaningless gibberish.
After reading this, you might want to board up your windows and load up your shotgun.
These guys owed it to the world to become badasses.
They may seem harmless, but get stuck sitting between "guy who's too into the commercials" and "football pro" and your head might just explode.
In order to strive for the future, one must mock the past.
You know what goes well with football? Easy listening music!
Not only are they not "frequent," but most just barely qualify as questions.
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